Took ten cops to pull me over....

(poznan, poland, June 5-6)
there is good news and bad news.. the good news is that i am no longer sick.. the bad news is that monika did not save money on her car insurance by switching to geiko..now why would i add that?? because she drives 130km/hr in the city of poznan..the limit is 50km/hr.. but everyone here does it aparently.. although she got busted once.. and didnt even have to pay a big ticket.. she pulled the student card.. and got the ticket cut in half.. not even the cry.. "just the im poor and a student".. i was busted for 12 oveer the limit a month or so ago.. and guess who had the bigger ticket...yep.. the wannabe highway bylaw cop gave me a bigger ticket than the actual -not just pretending to be a cop- cop gave monika.... where is the justice!!!

in my final full day in poznan i am finally healthy.. and pretty much back to shape... SO we celebrate by going to the oldest church in poznan.. one that was not fully destroyed in WWII.. just mostly destroyed.. like everything in poland.. as a history lesson.. Poland is basically a new city.. just made to look like an older city.... i love the the architecture of churches so great idea to rebuild them.. cause the new churches are just full of lack.. anywho.. amazing building.. gothic.. and quite simple.. i noticed this when i was in frankfurt, and some other churches in poznan.. they lack the insane wall carvings the british and french churches i have seen are adorned with.. oh well.. they still boast the crazy pillars and massive size.. although one thing more than any other caught my eye.. the priests whom were entombed here...

The tombs in this church were an oddity.. they had the usual writing on the wall.. "this is where so and so is".. and the stone carving of said priest.. although the priests all look like a hustler centerfold models... no joke.. half proped up on their sides.. pretty much the pose from titanic.. where the drawing is happening... i just thought of that.. and it works.. what carving dude would place priests in like sexual poses.. the pose alone is worth a million photos.. but it gets better!! they are smiliing!!!!.... celebate my ass.. they are trying to seduce you..there is no way that smile is because the dude is dead.. its cause he is inviting you.. come to me children.. (bad taste...probably.. but the problem had to start somewhere)... and i counted three playboy priests.. different areas of the church.. same pose.. same smile..

Monika also got some passes that enabled us to visit the basement of the church.. this was really cool.. although kinda scared the crap outta me.. i am not religious.. churches and churchy things scare me.. add a creepy environment.. fuck no.. terrified.. so i am glad that monika joined me.. otherwise i am sure i would have like lit on fire or something.. but the basement of this church was different.. well they were hiding something down there.. something that if revealed would shatter the foundations of the catholic church WAY more than the DaVinci Code ever could... the original stone foundations for the first church placed on that ground were preserved down there.. so there is like blocks and sand.. but WAIT!.. they totally raked the sand... in japanese rock garden designs.. you know where the sand is actualy water, and the rocks represent land.. THAT fun stuff.. well last i checked that wasnt christian.. actualy more of a buddhist/shinto belief in harmony creating mini worlds.. well wtf.. first playboy preists, and now buddhist crap.. this church has got some issues...while the playboy preists didnt garner the same laughs from monika.. the japanese rock garden had here questioning.. they are closet buddhists!!!... another reason for me to love poznan!!..

my evening was squared out with a return to a polish mexican restaurant.. and this version of mexico believed that french fries are served with every mexican meal.. um.. i think wrong.. but oh well.. it was the only restaurant to chose from. as i was GO KARTING...yes.. i tried my best.. the karts were super fast.. but i got my ass laped twice by marta (peters gf, peter would be monikas brother).. and even peter beat me pretty badly.. but i drive speed limits.. and yeild to the right.. not in poland.. they drive crazy fast.. and pass wherever they can..

since i was finally healthy again, i would finally have my night out on the town in poznan...Monika had been waiting for this moment.. she wanted to take me out and party since i arrived.. and finally it came.. the last night.. i like to finish strong.. so 10% beer.. actually good.. tasted like coke.. they wanted to take me to a dance club.. well i wasnt drunk yet so rock bar it was.. and damn.. polish zepplin cover band.. till 2am.. i was in heaven.. then when the band left the stage...what would you play after zepplin??.. well regular rock wont do.. so lets chuck on white zombie, and slipknot!!!!!!... mmmmm.. i could have died happy.. although it was only 2.30am, there are no ugly lights here... its early for polish bars.. so we ended going to three more bars.. and things still going strong 3,4,5.. right about the point at 5.30am where youd think wou would get tired, some dude in front of us made out with a plastic plant.. oh yeah!.. tongue.. gropping, hands going for the bra.. in this case searching for the non existant bra.. CAUSE IT WAS A PLANT!.. it was crazy.... and i didnt stop partying till 6am.. and i have another reason to love europe.. you dont stop partying till the sun comes up.. and even then.. fuck it.. its past noon back in canada so keep drinking..

(i know this is a long entry.. but there is more)

polish drinks..
10% beer.. nice again.. tastes like coke.. very dangerous.. cause i love coke.. i think the alchohol free beer probably tastes like pepsi.. so pepsi drinkers unite!.. ill go get hammered drinking coke...

Vodka martini- with sprite- monika bought this contraption for me.. very good.. i have never had a martini before.. i enjoyed it.. although i think at this point i couldnt really taste anything anyways..

the mystery drink.. while i was chilling listening/watching the polish people dance to "sweet home chicago" monika tried to get me a drink that is very interesting.. i never found out what alchohol it was.. but they had run out.. but the premise.. vermouth.. and something else..... light it on fire.. then cover the fire with a coaster with a straw poked through.. then suck up the fumes.. and drink through the straw.. aparently the fumes.. mess you right up.. THANKS monika!!.. lol.. anywho..

i have to thank Monika, and her brother Peter for having me for like 4 days.. you two are amazing i love both of you!!.. and a special thanks to monika, thank you for answering all of my questions and tolerating my very politically incorrect comments... i constantly asked about WWI, WWII, and the communist reign in poland, and you answered gracefully.. thank you a million!


berlin next....... (dont mention the war..lol)